You Can Save A Life By Letting Go of Anger

Holding on to a Grudge Can Be Justified or Even Feel Good But What is the Cost

Lawyers can be quick to get angry or hold a grudge. Because of the adversarial nature of the legal profession, it might be easy for a solicitor or lawyer to keep a list of transgressions.

The problem with holding a grudge is that anger can eat us alive. It can also cause us health difficulties.

When we are resentful with someone, we relive the transgression as if they were crimes. We hold conversations with ourselves about what bad people they are. We have arguments with people who aren’t even there. We can replay the incident over and over again in our head.

Ok, I admit it. Anger can feel darned good sometimes, especially when someone did something wrong. Let me tell you my story.

I recall an instance with my younger brother who was always in trouble and on drugs. He was a real disappointment to our family. He really made me angry. I had tried to help him financially, and I convinced my Dad and another brother to help him.

My brother used the money for drugs instead of getting his impounded truck out so that he could work. I made up my mind that I was NEVER going to help him again.

Fast forward a year later, I was sitting in my office. This was during the six-year period where I worked recruiting partners. I only accepted partners with $1 Million plus business for AM 100 law firms throughout the US.

I was minding my own business when I got this thought; it was almost like a voice. It said, “Call your brother and tell him that you know of a place where he can get sober.” I immediately shook that off as a stupid idea.

The next day the same thing happened. The voice was a little louder. I spoke out loud to this ridiculous idea. “No way I’m going to help him again!”

The third day as I was working at my computer the voice repeated it, “Call your brother. Tell him that you know a place where he can get sober.” Irritated, I said to myself, “Okay! Okay!”

I picked up the phone called my brother. I said, “If you ever want to get sober, I know of a place that you can get sober here in Florida.”

He immediately said, “I’m ready.”

The thing is, I didn’t even know of a place he could get sober. Telling him, I would check around and try to find a place; I called someone, who might know. However, we played phone tag for two weeks and never talked.

I forgot about the entire idea of helping my brother until my phone rang. It was my brother, and he asked me, “I thought you said there was a place I could get sober?”

“Oh!” I said. “Let me find a place.” I took my lunch hour and found a place for him. I got him a flight down here. Long story short, my brother has been sober for over ten years.

I had to let go of my anger, and it probably saved his life.

Before you write someone off or refuse to forgive them, think about my story. You may have a change of heart.